Comments on: Explain your commitment to public service and service to country generally http://andrewspittle.net/2009/03/12/explain-your-commitment-to-public-service-and-service-to-country-generally/ WordPress, education, and technology FTW Mon, 04 Jun 2012 00:40:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ By: Leah http://andrewspittle.net/2009/03/12/explain-your-commitment-to-public-service-and-service-to-country-generally/comment-page-1/#comment-361 Mon, 16 Mar 2009 00:03:28 +0000 http://andrewspittle.net/?p=682#comment-361 In my opinion, the weakest of the essays.

My commitment to public service and my community is one that reaches back INto high school.

“Since the many hours that I spent running youth basketball leagues and volunteering at paintball tournaments that benefited the Special Olympics I have continued to be involved in the Whitman College and greater Walla Walla communities.” Rather awkward sentence structure.

Your paragraph on the Pio could be stronger- particularly with some stronger language to give some oomph and originality. Make the last paragraph longer and stronger too. Ending with parentheses is pretty lame.

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